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Showing posts from March 11, 2018

Queen's Sheriff IX

"Den whad diddy say?" the sheriff asks. "Well sheriff. As far as I know, the Great Buddha did not answer that question at all. He simply sat there in silence and let one of his disciples answer for him," the queen responds. "So whad didda diss hype L's say?" the sheriff asks. "The disciple said that from meditation, he was able to achieve peace, calm, tranquility, and a true sense of the self. He was able to realize the three meridian channels flowing throughout his body and harness his chi energy to cycle the flow through the universal loop atop his head down to the base of his spine." "Dat sounds com play Kate did," the sheriff responds. "It's really not that complicated," the queen corrected, "and what's beautiful about it, is that anybody can do it." "You mean aye can do id?" he asks. "Anybody can, yes even you can," the queen answered, "to achieve Buddha mind, one h

The Queen's Sheriff (Part VIII)

"He sed ta me dat when the Great Buddha was axed whad he hoped ta gain from da meditation, and den da Buddha said to him 'nothing!.' So's I says okay, dat done make sense. and so dis guy says ta me, 'of course not to a commoner such as yourself, for the Buddha gained nothin bud was able ta remove all his hate, and greed, and anger, and negativity by meditating." "I'm so relieved sheriff that you spoken in this manner, was this one of my student's? do you know his name?" "Yah, he colds himself 'Dareel Zendeele' but I tolds him you'd ged mad and he sed you are harmless, so I kicked him out back to his district an told him not to come back for a month." the sheriff apologetically relays to me with a slight hint of concern that I might not believe his story. "I am aware of this man-child that is preaching and professing throughout the kingdom, claiming to be my master." "Well whad should we do Master Che

The Queen's Sheriff (Part VII)

"hmm...." I offer him verbally, as if proof of my ability to objectively mentally digest what was about to be revealed. "dat sheriff," he continues, "found himself answerin ta da edge of one of da Queen's royal guard swords," he concludes. "Sounds like the deputies used him as a scapegoat," I suggest in lieu of the knowledge of the reasoning behind the decision. "Da ways I heard it was dat da crowds were demanding da queen return da monies or offer some sort of vigilante justice foe dey losses, and they gathered outside da court ready ta revolt cause ub dey said id was his fault foe being da supervisor ub his depudees." "I see my friend. You are troubled by the responsibilities set upon you by the queen?" I inquire as an offer of my understanding of the troubling thoughts tinkering in his head. "Huh? Nah masta, I can do ma job, whadaya mean?" he replies. This is why I have always appreciated my friendship

The Queen's Sheriff (Part VI)

"Well masta, ebentially, all da foreign property imported widdout paying foe da newly formed import taxes was confiscated by da deputies. Da rumors had spread dat da deputies were selling or habbing someone sell foe dem da contraband on da dark market, an da funds were used ta acquire more resources ta furtha persist da deputies' efforts ta collect more contraband." "The dark market?" I interrupt him, informing him of my ignorance, "I'm afraid that's a new term to me." "Yeah, you neva heard ub da dark market?" he questions me in disbelief. "I may have heard of it by a different name," I suggest, "but please continue." "Maybe zen master, but I'll tell you about dat after dis, cuz dat's important too, ya know?" "Yes, that would be interesting to learn about, please continue," I offer. "Where was I now..." he mumbles passed his lips as he stumbles in his thoughts. "Y

The Queen's Sheriff (Part V)

I offer my version of a diplomatic response, "Well sheriff, unfortunately, it failed to stimulate the proper macroeconomic development across multiple kingdoms because of unfair trading practices, you are correct," I reassure him, "the pricing differences were due to the poor foresight of the instability in market fluctuations among the varied kingdoms throughout all the lands and the arbitrage in pricing presented an advantage that allowed traders to realize profits at the expense other citizen's income losses. As other kingdoms established their own import and export regulations, the arbitrary fluctuations provided greater arbitrage, which provided even more opportunities for investors to realize huge gains in economies of scale, which then led to a repeal of the law by the Queen, if I understand it correctly," ending my statement with as little condescension as possible. "Wow master," he interjects, "I'm not so sure if any of dat is tru

The Queen's Sheriff (Part IV)

Though the sheriff understood that he could collect a separate tax from certain households, he did not fully grasp the mathematical equations that calculated the amounts to be collected from individual income-earning households. We discussed last week some theories on net versus gross income, but since I was not privy to the stipulations of the new legislation, his ambiguous questions were unclear and seemed irrelevant to the nature of the new posting he had just announced. Though the new law does specify details applicable to the enforcement, proper regression analysis against the previously existing laws was performed hastily under pressure from the advocates of the law, specifically the wealthy citizens living in the Brahman district, and now a loophole exists that the rich Brahman residents intended, and the sheriff seems to have some insight into, regarding the ability to collect higher percentages from certain demographics, obviously those demographics do not include the Bra

The Queen's Sheriff (Part III)

"Tell me sheriff Cashgrow," the queen beseeches him, "you were only recently elected, have my advisors advised me of the correct fact?" "Yes ma queen," the sheriff responds. "Yet you have gained great admiration among your people in that short time," the queen passively offering her own admiration with her tone. "Well, ma queen, I juss make sure everybody duz everything fayer," the sheriff elevates his voice, almost shouting, but the queen understands his passion on the subject. He continues, "if two guys starts a fight, well den who really started it? Trowing dem both in jail would have ta be if it happened a second time. Tha first time, somebody started it, after that, a segund time? No! they both go to jail. Haaahaa," the sheriff blares a loud roar as he laughs. "And what if the guilty man is stalking the innocent one, leading to a second altercation?" the queen inquires. The sheriff stops his laughte

The Queen's Sheriff (Part II)

"First Sheriff, you must understand the rules," Queen Halvah advises the sheriff. "Yes'ya majesty," the sheriff acknowledges his attention is focused on her words. "Very well," the queen condones as she begins explaining her reasoning behind her laws. "If an issue arises that cannot be resolved peacefully, and a non-peaceful solution would lead to more problems, then a constituent, that is any citizen with the right to vote, may ask that the issue be escalated for resolution to the queen's court, in an attempt to appeal a sheriff's decision in administering a resolution. I and my court's staff take great consideration when accepting an appeal, knowing the risk it poses to a sheriff's reputation, the only true voice of the people throughout the kingdom." "So's I can punish people fa performing poorly" the sheriff humbly interjects. "Yes sheriff," the queen confirms. "Where was I? An issue

The Queen's Sheriff (Part I)

The Queen and da Sharift Sheriff Edwin Cashgrow is one of the few elected officers of the court, commissioned by the queen and elected by the people of his district to enforce the laws within the queen's kingdom. He is bound by duty to uphold the spirit of the socialist equality upon which the kingdom is founded. He has ruled justly so far within the district of the constituents who elected him with no complaints from any of the those people. Most other law enforcement of the queen's kingdom are appointed to their respective offices by the queen herself, such as the royal guards, or a representative of the queen's court, such as palace and marketplace officers. The queen's palace and the royal marketplace are governed under her direct order. If anything happens at either of those locations that leads to a dispute between two people, two businesses, or any other types of entities, then the queen is given total autonomy for deciding a fair and reasonable resolution

Dark Market Bar

"I expect you to take care of that," my lord orders of me. His large hands busy lighting his last bogie. He walks across the front of the bar, scanning the floorboards in front of his feet with a clarity and mental emptiness I hunger for.   "If she cannot be turned my master, she will fall victim to my blade like the others before her," I answer obediently. He nods once then turns his gaze back towards the floor as if unsure of the path before me. I turn away, my back to my master, and sit on the couch closest to the far end of the bar.  His doubts of my abilities leaves me with doubts of my own. But I was sure of my purpose when I joined the ranks. My allegiance to the dark market bar has been beyond reproach in my eyes since I was recruited, but not in the eyes of the other soldiers who have served longer and remain in lower rank in the eyes of the goblin king. He values my opinion and often seeks it out, but not this time. This time, he has made hi

Dark Market III

Rob Boblend, though not a licensed master of kungfu, trained for a few years as a child directly under the grandmaster Hoblin. "Tell me Robbie," the queen inquires, "why didn't you ever open your own kungfu studio like Bob's Zen Chen and Hob's Shen Do did." "I'm far too old for teaching children now," he answers solemnly. "I know," her kindness disarms him, "I meant when you were younger." "Well," he begins, leaning back in his chair at the royal tea house, "I always wanted..." "Then why not?" she interjects her astonishment. "My brothers wanted me to fight," he states honestly, knowing the laws forbid fighting. "Oh," she again interrupts, this time her suprise leaning her into her chair as well. "Well, I didn't, but there were other more serious issues. My brothers wanted me to fight in the royal army, but the younger kids in the hood lacked a

Queen's Robot

Queen's Robot Once upon a time, a queen ruled alongside her husband, and that time is now. The queen is taller than her subjects, doubling their height in most cases. Her height made her vulnerable, so she had a robot built to serve as a loyal bodyguard. She has been waiting for the robot to be completed so she can safely search for an old friend she lost touch with centuries ago. Building the robot was a project that spanned many decades. The king wanted his wife's safety guaranteed, so the project took a long time while it was programmed with every possible scenario in which harm might come to the queen. The engineers even accounted for acts of God, even though the king insisted that was the one case they didn't have to worry about. "God wouldn't dare defy me; I'm the great goblin king!" he would respond whenever the subject was brought up. The engineers were horrified by the blasphemy they witnessed, but the king was confident that his intended me

Dark Market II

Dark Market Part II Begin Chapter 2 "I didn't know you catered to vampires," the king finally admits after taking a few moments to let his anger cool. "I'm not breaking the law," Shen says. "No, you're not old friend, you're not breaking the law," the king agrees. "They're not very good customers anyway," Shen says. "Well...business is business," the king says. "I've been training again," Master Shen confides to the king. "Training? You do seem a little out of shape," the king jokes sarcastically, knowing Shen is hiding dense muscles under his modest garments. "I must confront my old enemy," Shen admits. "Another battle in the kingdom?" the king asks. "Not this time," Shen answers. "What do you mean?" the king asks in confusion, "you just said you are training to confront Chen?" "I am training to avoid a battle when I do con

The Dark Market

Dark Market Once upon a time, and that time is now. Shen do Shen owns a small business in the dark market, which he keeps hidden in the back room of a legitimate business in the royal marketplace. The front business, also known as just a front, is a dry cleaning store. In the back room, Shen sells various spices as a luxury commodity to the wealthier class of citizens in the kingdom. Today is a special occasion for which the dry cleaner's store is closed and no visitors are permitted into the back market. The king has requested a visit a few days ago to purchase spice. Aside from the fact that the king wants the store to himself because he is very busy and doesn't have time to get tangled up in long lines at a busy market, Shen knows the king will purchase a large quantity of spice. So Shen can afford to close the market for one day and still earn a day's worth of profits just from what the king will spend. "Your majesty, to what do I owe this pleasure?" Sh